For as long as I can remember, I’ve found people, men in particular, to be fascinating. While the love of the written word has been in my blood for as long as I can remember, the very nature of human nature never ceases to amaze me. And as a writer, I find my male characters, both hero and secondary, enthralling. And I wonder to myself – Just what are they thinking?
The men of our stories, our heroes, are on a journey of self-discovery. In meeting and falling in love with our heroines, they must break one of the cardinal rules of manhood – open up to themselves and their ladies. They must fall in love and actually have the capacity to do so.
There are numerous resources out there to facilitate the research into exactly what men are thinking. We do, after all, want to paint an accurate picture. So what are these resources? Libraries and online sites are filled with books that help spell out for the 21st Century woman exactly what men are thinking. Classic among these is ‘Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus’.
Another gold mine is the internet. I stumbled upon this resource on my way to check in on my writing group VaNo. It’s a Yahoo group and, as such, Yahoo comes up and lists clips on interesting bits of information. On that particular day, they featured an article on four reasons men marry. And I thought to myself, they were able to come up with four? Off the top of my head I could only come up with one. He married because he met the love of his life and could not fathom life without her. Yes, that’s the romance writer in me speaking. So I clicked on it and found my way to ‘Men’s Health’, a men’s magazine in its internet incarnation.
What an eye opener! It’s geared toward men in their twenties and thirties and focuses on men’s health (duh), getting and staying fit and staying at the top of your game. It is also full of helpful hints on how to get and keep your woman – in a very PC, “this is the 21st century” kind of way. It seems, ladies, that what men are thinking is how to please us – in every way. Who knew?! All this time they’ve been concerned about keeping our goals a priority and to keep the lines of communication open.
And then it hit me! Men think just like we do and want the same things we do! And this is exactly how the men in romance behave – once they’ve come to their senses and realized that they are in love and want the whole world to know it. Whether it’s at a ball with the heroine’s favorite urchins surrounding them or while filming a cooking show that everyone from their hometown has come to watch.
So, friends, in your own reading or writing, what are your heroes thinking? Are they listening to what other people are saying to them or do they prefer to drive on through without stopping for directions?
Terrio here – I want to thank Santa (pictured above left with Eloisa James center and myself at the 2007 New Jersey Romance Writer’s Conference) for joining us today. This is her first blog ever and what a topic to tackle. To celebrate and in honor of our Foodie guest, one lucky commenter is going to win the Little Cheese & Wine Book by Gregor Schaefer as well as What Men Think About by Patrick Wahl. Now get commenting and good luck!
For as long as I can remember, I’ve found people, men in particular, to be fascinating. While the love of the written word has been in my blood for as long as I can remember, the very nature of human nature never ceases to amaze me. And as a writer, I find my male characters, both hero and secondary, enthralling. And I wonder to myself – Just what are they thinking?
And Terrio, you’re just a naughty minx
Who told you that? Damn it, that was a secret…LOL!
I’m totally innocent. I just play a perv on the internet.
Q! So nice of you to cross the pond for my very first blog!
Hellion – I’ve always loved Virginia Woolf and I think I’ll add that to my signature.
hvitveis – See there is the mistaken idea of American men, as well as, European men. How they experess themselves would be a great topic for another day. As well as, how that sort of emotional devestment is expressed in romance.
I happen to be reading Gabriel Garcia Marquez’s biography which has provided wonderful insight into, not only what he was thinking through his life but how that was manifested in – what I consider – to be his brilliant writing career. He also happens to be one of my favorite authors of all time. Way before he was Oprahfied.
Santa back again! I couldn’t sign off without commenting on Jim’s comment. Jim and I went to college together and Jim, like many in his family, are steadfast in their convictions and world views, lol. He thought the same exact things back in the day…it’s refreshing that he still holds true to them!*w*
And J Perry can’t be Ship Bouncer. At least not if there’s any high winds. She’d have to be tethered to the mast!
Thanks a billion for having me today! You are the best pirate wenches around! And thank you to everyone who visited today! You ROCK!
I’m a late night person, so I’ll be back later! In case anyone else has any other pearls of wisdom.
I’m just sayin’!
Santa – you have been such a fantastic guest blogger and set a record for the most comments ever on the ship! Whoohoo!!!
Thanks for taking us up on the invite and be prepared for us to pester…err…I mean, invite you again in the future!
SantaBaby!
Congratulations upon the launch of your First blog.
I see that you are burning up the internet with your words of wisdom. Break out the Champaign. Alas… though it pains me to say it… I must agree with JPerry. Men are heaps of vulnerable jelly beneath those rock hard abs. As a woman of vast refinement I must confess that I find a man’s rock hard body parts to be quite attractive… all of them except for their rock hard heads. (The one that sits above the shoulders you lil’ perverts!) You cannot tell a man what to do… or how to do it!
Quantum what a Sweat Dear you are to stand up for Men and their Minds. Now honestly Q, we women are quite aware that males have minds… if you didn’t … then how could we possibly make you lose them? (A particularly fave hobby of mine, by the way) You are Such an Innocence among the Wicked Women. Come sit by me and I protect you from… What is making you uncomfortable? Are you Worried that we don’t like… love… men as they really are? See Quantum it’s like this love, as hopskipjump said. “I Think it’s important to note that you’re not writing a Man’s POV; you’re writing how a woman wants her man (or men)to think; act, etc. And, from a reader’s POV, that’s a lot of fun. We know that it’s a Fantasy.
That’s Why we like it!
Of course that doesn’t mean that we don’t like Real flesh and blood men. Just like you dear…
I noticed Quantum that you wrote “Here’s my quick random list:”
Well. That explains your male dominated list! You had a Premature Evaluation! Perhaps next time you should be slooow and thorough in your list making… and in everything else you do. Ask any woman, gentlemen, and she will tell you “a man who uses his head slowly and thoroughly is far superior to one who is quick and random!”
OXOX
Julie
Santa, why do I suspect that you wish that I had stayed in retirement?
Crumbs! After commenting that men do think of other things, I went to bed with the most beautiful woman on the planet and,,,,you guessed it *g*
I’m sorry I ‘chapped your arse’ J Perry Stone. I have of course met many brilliant women in my work and have huge respect for the gentler more intuitive approach that they can bring to life in general and science in particular.
My omission of Madame Curie was a silly oversight Hellion, In any complete list of ‘greats’ she would certainly have to be there.
Terri, I think you can read me like a book! Thanks for ‘saving my arse’ once again *g*
Julie, could you move over a little please, I want to take this real slow, no more premature evaluations. I do so love a woman who will listen to me and slow me down. *w*
There, thats the closest I’m going to an abject apology. Now pirates, I need a drink! Where is Hellion hiding that scotch.
Bwah-hah-hah! Guess who’s gate-crashed the pirate party?
Q, you’re treading shark infested waters here, as I think you’ve probably figured out.
I about spewed rum over my keyboard at that “gentler” comment…haven’t you figured out that the female is by far the more dangerous of the sexes?
Seriously, though…a coworker and I were having a conversation in a similar vein last night. She’s about despaired of ever having her dh present her with a gift that she can appreciate. It’s as though her hints and downright direct suggestions don’t penetrate the dura mater. She’s this tiny little thing and he buys her a sweatshirt…in XL. ???
Mine still hasn’t figured out after almost 30 years together that I want a diamond…I don’t care how overhyped and overpriced they are…I want something big and sparkly on my finger,dammit! And he won’t ask for directions. He won’t read directions for putting things together, or usage instructions for appliances.
But I love him anyway!
All this leads me to believe that all men think about (generally) is sex and how they can get it, booze and when they can get it, food and when the next feeding time is and sports, which is the modern equivalent of war(defending their territory).
I will grant you, there ARE exceptions, as there are in all generalities. Mine doesn’t drink alcohol in any form. He just doesn’t like it, but you can substitute a Coca-cola for the beer and you’d just about have him pegged.
Julie! Thanks for stopping by and as eloquent as always. Q, you couldn’t be in safer hands….really.
My, my Q! You do the pretty so well. Hellion, get him the good scotch you keep behind the ship’s wheel.
And Cinthia! Well said sister! And go for the sparkle! I think everyone deserves The Rock…I mean a rock!
Glad to see the party carried on.
Julie – I think you even scared me. LOL!
Cinthia – that’s why we’re more dangerous, we’ve convinced them we’re the gentler sex. It’s all subterfuge. Am I even close on the spelling of that one?
Q – Bud, I’ve got your back. But I do recommend a bit more contemplation the next time. Not sure how many times we can extract that loafer.
Damn, this was one party. *hands Q the scotch* Great job, Santa, and thanks to everyone who stopped by to talk today. It was great having you on board.
Wow, I almost feel like a Carnival ship
Santa, stopping by really late here. Congratulations on your first blog. Hot men, eh? Way to begin your blogging career!!
Since men in real life rarely think like we women do, it’s nice to have the fantasy that all men in romance novels eventually come to think like we do, at least where it matters–love, romance, children, our hobbies, and our pet beliefs.