C’Mere… Let Me Whisper in Your Ear.
I saw the look in his eye when I glanced at him from over the crowded room. It started out so quietly before it grew into a wildfire. His eyes were like black diamonds, sparking with his fury. It was unbelievably bad luck for him to be here of all places. There would be hell to pay later in the game but for now, I couldn’t think about anything else. My eye was on the prize.
I returned his stare, unblinking even as goosebumps raced down my arms. He held my gaze for just a second longer than he normally would and fear prickled down my spine. He knew. My heart stopped at the thought and my knees knocked together. I held my breath as I tried to gather my composure..
“… wouldn’t you agree?” Cold fingers grazed my upper arm and five pairs of friendly eyes stared in my direction. I blinked as though I were seeing my companions for the first time tonight. I licked my lips anxiously as I struggled with my words.
“I- I’m sorry.” My voice carried a little louder than I’d wished and Kiki’s eyes widened when she turned to look at me two social circles over. I heard her start to excuse herself as well before I shook my head slightly to signal her off. “Excuse me. I need a bit of fresh air.”
I didn’t wait for a reply before I slipped quietly between guest and headed out to the terrace. I watched the french double doors from over my shoulder as I leaned against the stone rail. No one seemed to notice I left the party in a semi-hurry. The breeze brushed over me and I suppressed a shiver. Indian summer had held out for as long as she could before giving away to the chilly autumn air and I silently cursed my stupidity of wearing a black sleeveless dress. I rubbed my hands over my arms to give them an extra burst of warmth before heading out into the perfectly manicured garden.
___
A lot of romantic suspense writing is all about keeping secrets until the big reveal. You get to reveal bits and pieces along the way but my favorite part of this type of writing, and especially first person is that I’m the only one who really knows what’s going to happen and how’s it’s going to work out. Secrets require a lot of trust between two people. Someone who tells the secret and someone who keeps it. I like to think this is how romantic relationships are built up throughout the story line, not to mention getting to know someone you can’t stand in the beginning and then falling head over heels for them accidentally.
This isn’t true of Sadie. Sadie marches to the beat of her own drummer. She likes her life - the double one that she leads - just the way it is and having a permanent fixture in her life isn’t an option in the first book. Or the second one. Not really getting close to it in the third either. I mean, she has a working relationship with one guy and something more but not sure what it is with another. Sadie doesn’t trust anyone, especially herself and I’d like to think I’d take her on the journey to find that trust inside of herself so she can move forward. Sort of like how people tell you- You have to learn yourself before someone else can love you the way you deserve to be loved. This is a lesson that Sadie needs to learn to move on.
I liken keeping secrets in my WIPs to keeping a diary as a kid. It’s nearly the same concept. I had this pretty white diary with little flowers on it. It was a cheapo that I begged for at Christmas time. The diary had the fold over and you slid the lock home. I had a little brass key, no bigger than your thumbnail that I kept on a tattered old blue ribbon. It might have been a hair ribbon for a doll. I might have taken it from my best friend. I’m not sure. But I kept it hidden behind my clothes hanging up in the makeshift closet and my diary was hidden in the tiny crack of space between the ceiling and the top shelving for the hanging bar to insure ultimate secrecy.
I had this diary for years. It was my private stash of everything I ever thought of and filled mostly of thoughts about how I was going to marry Rob and have lots of babies and live in a tree house. This is all irrelevant. The jist of the diary is that it’s the mind that you wish you could keep. And secrets in a story are like that. Everything in the world eventually gets revealed and sometimes it’s not at the right moment, but most things are within your control. Everything can hinge off how you walk and talk through secrets and handle the truth. Trust, truth and secrecy go hand in hand. And for your main hero and heroine (and all those sub characters who function from what happens between the hero and heroine) they must have these to make the story work.
Secrets are what keeps the world turning and are the bread and butter of all books. No matter what brand you write or buy. They weave in and out of your plot, your characters, subplots, voice- you can’t escape. It’s how you get a functioning black moment at the end. You can be lying to yourself and suddenly it becomes so clear… all along you were lying to yourself and the truth was right in front of your face the whole time.
How do you know what type of secret is the right one to keep and the right one to tell while writing? Do some secrets just show up out of the blue? Readers, what are the best secrets kept by the hero and heroine that you like to read in the big reveal?
I saw the look in his eye when I glanced at him from over the crowded room. It started out so quietly before it grew into a wildfire. His eyes were like black diamonds, sparking with his fury. It was unbelievably bad luck for him to be here of all places. There would be hell to pay later in the game but for now, I couldn’t think about anything else. My eye was on the prize.
I returned his stare, unblinking even as goosebumps raced down my arms. He held my gaze for just a second longer than he normally would and fear prickled down my spine. He knew. My heart stopped at the thought and my knees knocked together. I held my breath as I tried to gather my composure..
“… wouldn’t you agree?” Cold fingers grazed my upper arm and five pairs of friendly eyes stared in my direction. I blinked as though I were seeing my companions for the first time tonight. I licked my lips anxiously as I struggled with my words.
“I- I’m sorry.” My voice carried a little louder than I’d wished and Kiki’s eyes widened when she turned to look at me two social circles over. I heard her start to excuse herself as well before I shook my head slightly to signal her off. “Excuse me. I need a bit of fresh air.”
I didn’t wait for a reply before I slipped quietly between guest and headed out to the terrace. I watched the french double doors from over my shoulder as I leaned against the stone rail. No one seemed to notice I left the party in a semi-hurry. The breeze brushed over me and I suppressed a shiver. Indian summer had held out for as long as she could before giving away to the chilly autumn air and I silently cursed my stupidity of wearing a black sleeveless dress. I rubbed my hands over my arms to give them an extra burst of warmth before heading out into the perfectly manicured garden.
___
A lot of romantic suspense writing is all about keeping secrets until the big reveal. You get to reveal bits and pieces along the way but my favorite part of this type of writing, and especially first person is that I’m the only one who really knows what’s going to happen and how’s it’s going to work out. Secrets require a lot of trust between two people. Someone who tells the secret and someone who keeps it. I like to think this is how romantic relationships are built up throughout the story line, not to mention getting to know someone you can’t stand in the beginning and then falling head over heels for them accidentally.
This isn’t true of Sadie. Sadie marches to the beat of her own drummer. She likes her life - the double one that she leads - just the way it is and having a permanent fixture in her life isn’t an option in the first book. Or the second one. Not really getting close to it in the third either. I mean, she has a working relationship with one guy and something more but not sure what it is with another. Sadie doesn’t trust anyone, especially herself and I’d like to think I’d take her on the journey to find that trust inside of herself so she can move forward. Sort of like how people tell you- You have to learn yourself before someone else can love you the way you deserve to be loved. This is a lesson that Sadie needs to learn to move on.
I liken keeping secrets in my WIPs to keeping a diary as a kid. It’s nearly the same concept. I had this pretty white diary with little flowers on it. It was a cheapo that I begged for at Christmas time. The diary had the fold over and you slid the lock home. I had a little brass key, no bigger than your thumbnail that I kept on a tattered old blue ribbon. It might have been a hair ribbon for a doll. I might have taken it from my best friend. I’m not sure. But I kept it hidden behind my clothes hanging up in the makeshift closet and my diary was hidden in the tiny crack of space between the ceiling and the top shelving for the hanging bar to insure ultimate secrecy.
I had this diary for years. It was my private stash of everything I ever thought of and filled mostly of thoughts about how I was going to marry Rob and have lots of babies and live in a tree house. This is all irrelevant. The jist of the diary is that it’s the mind that you wish you could keep. And secrets in a story are like that. Everything in the world eventually gets revealed and sometimes it’s not at the right moment, but most things are within your control. Everything can hinge off how you walk and talk through secrets and handle the truth. Trust, truth and secrecy go hand in hand. And for your main hero and heroine (and all those sub characters who function from what happens between the hero and heroine) they must have these to make the story work.
Secrets are what keeps the world turning and are the bread and butter of all books. No matter what brand you write or buy. They weave in and out of your plot, your characters, subplots, voice- you can’t escape. It’s how you get a functioning black moment at the end. You can be lying to yourself and suddenly it becomes so clear… all along you were lying to yourself and the truth was right in front of your face the whole time.
How do you know what type of secret is the right one to keep and the right one to tell while writing? Do some secrets just show up out of the blue? Readers, what are the best secrets kept by the hero and heroine that you like to read in the big reveal?
September 10th, 2008 at 8:23 am
Sin, I loved the idea of you keeping all your thoughts in a secret diary and
then hiding it where no-one could find it. You’re such a lovable romantic old
thing!
You could almost make that diary the basis for a novel, or at least for setting
the background to a mystery and then make your childhood dreams come true.
I like to think that in my work I’m helping to unravel the secrets of nature.
Sort of probing the Creator’s secret diary. Though God thoughtfully encrypted
his diary so that not every Tom Dick and Harry can read it! When we get to the
end, to quote Stephen Hawking, ‘We will truly know the mind of God’
When I get my hands on your book perhaps I will truly know the mind of Sin *g*
Lovely blog Sin. You always write from the heart!
September 10th, 2008 at 8:24 am
We’re all wonky again. WTF?!
I’m loving this topic. I don’t think I’ve ever thought about secrets in my WIP.
But now I need to. I love the idea that as the writer, I’m the only one who
really knows what’s going to happen. That’s fun.
As to when I’m reading, I’m not sure there’s a type of secret I like but I know
I love it when something happens that I didn’t see coming. I loved to be
surprised.
September 10th, 2008 at 8:29 am
I just deleted the blog and brought it back up. It’s still wonkers with the formatting but I think the site is better.
September 10th, 2008 at 8:40 am
Q- if I ever finish anything and you read it. Please let me know if you know the mind of Sin. I’m not sure I know it myself. LOL
I love how you put that. “Though God thoughtfully encrypted his diary so that not every Tom Dick and Harry can read it!” I know you work to even crack into a little of that diary. So in theory that would make you a hacker!
September 10th, 2008 at 8:42 am
Isn’t it fun to be the one who inserts the secrets? It’s one of the perks I found after I started writing. I didn’t realize what sort of mischief I could stir up and then fix and it was all in my head. No one else was reading the same thing. It was only me! I love it.
September 10th, 2008 at 8:44 am
I think a lot of this has to do with pacing. I think it’s important to give a little bit at a time, to keep the story moving. I think that way a reader won’t lose interest.
I do think it’s hard to have a first person narrative where the protagonist just leaves stuff out. I’ve read some first person books and half way through it becomes apparent that the “I” voice has been keeping something from me.
September 10th, 2008 at 8:54 am
This was something I had to work on in my current RS. I open in the middle of a secret—an art hoax. But not telling my readers that the exhibition was fake just left them confused.
On the other hand, the MC figuring out who the murderer is in chapter 3 would make the book 1.) less suspenseful (no one in their right mind would try to spend time with a murderer, even if they were trying to catch him, and the heroine shouldn’t be stupid) and 2.) shorter.
I think you should share just enough so your readers aren’t confused (and so the biggest reveal doesn’t come out of nowhere), but leave room for lots of surprises. As I was writing, different characters would suddenly pipe up with secrets that made for fun plot twists. (”Guess what! I have a secret I’m keeping from the other characters! Tell it in chapter 4. But not all of it. Save the rest for chapter 18.”)
September 10th, 2008 at 9:05 am
Marn- I agree with the pacing. Pacing is very important when dealing with secrets in a WIP. Just like Jordan said at the end of her comment, “Tell it in chapter 4 but not all of it. Save the rest for Chapter 18.” I love that. String me along like a sad puppy waiting for a bone and just waiting for that next little tidbit to get me through the next few minutes.
I love the “I” voice. For me, it’s easy to keep the secrets in suspense, because if she’s not there seeing it first hand, we don’t know it’s happened. It keeps the intrigue at a high level all the way until the end.
September 10th, 2008 at 9:07 am
This has been an interesting ride this morning…LOL!
Jordan - good point about not confusing the reader. Since I don’t write RS, I’m thinking it might be easier for me as the secrets are more about the characters’ pasts and less about a mystery.
Marn - so true on the pacing. As Jordan mentions, you can’t reveal too much too early. Then the book would end by chapter 10. When I first started writing this WIP (and had NO IDEA what I was doing…lol), I pretty much had the HEA by page 200. Yeah, can we say “Terri can’t find conflict to save her life?” Well, not in writing anyway.
September 10th, 2008 at 9:11 am
Jordan- It’s the same thing I have to work on in my RS WIP. But I don’t reveal enough. It’s one of those things that it’s all in my head and I’m writing along without a care in the world then someone else reads it and says to me “What’s going on? I don’t understand?”. I need to play a little looser with my secrets. LOL
September 10th, 2008 at 9:15 am
Terri - Without revealing too much (LOL) (since I just sent Marn chapter 4 last night), the chapter 4/18 secret actually is one about my character’s past. I get twice the secrets! Hooray!
September 10th, 2008 at 9:16 am
Sin - Same here. I was all disappointed because I liked springing the hoax secret in chapter three, but I’d probably lose my readers before that if they were as confused as my CPs were!
September 10th, 2008 at 9:19 am
Where I got messed up was when I had to delete the original first 100 pages of my WIP. At that point, I kept forgetting that the reader didn’t know any of what I had deleted. But I couldn’t delete the knowledge from my brain. Does that make sense?
I needed to write all that to get to know the characters but then I had trouble writing the real stuff as if none of that had been written. I know this isn’t making sense. LOL! Anyone get me?
September 10th, 2008 at 9:23 am
I’ve deleted my RS so many times that I forget what I deleted in the first place. Though, it’s really not deleted just moved to the external HD in case of an emergency.
You make total sense to me.
September 10th, 2008 at 10:12 am
Me, keep a secret? Please. I can’t even keep secrets out of my damned query letters. “The hero of my fabulous book is married to someone else at the beginning of the novel. But don’t let that deter you, the man is sex on a stick.” I mean, you’d think people would be begging to see the first chapters, but that is so not the case.
The only way I was able to keep the secret about who Cindy was in my own book was because I DIDN’T KNOW. I had some other lame idea for her, very vague, and my critique partner was reading along and guessed her idea of who Cindy was (not realizing I didn’t know) and her idea was so much better than mine, I adopted it immediately.
I don’t have any secrets for A&E yet. I have a secret or two for Lucy, but that’s because he’s deceitful and has to have some secrets. However, as much as A&E are supposed to not stand each other, you’d think they’d have a few more secrets.
September 10th, 2008 at 10:25 am
I should have known you’d understand me, Sin. My sister in delete land. Though you are the queen of delete and I’m happy to bow to you.
I’m sure A&E have secrets. As you say, you just don’t know them yet. LOL! Face it, your characters keep you on a need to know basis.
September 10th, 2008 at 10:26 am
I have a problem keeping secrets too, Hellion. In my stories I have to work really hard not to ‘reveal’ everything too soon. I kind of liken this to an open wound bleeding all over the page. I’ve got to learn to tighten the bandage and let it seep. Is that too gory an analogy? LOL.
Love your voice, Sin! I knew I was reading your work right away.
September 10th, 2008 at 11:39 am
Hellion- I know deep down inside of there, A&E have secrets. Secret petty stuff that they like to do to one another.
September 10th, 2008 at 11:40 am
Kathy that’s why it’s important to revise it once you’ve written it all the way. Then you have the chance to hide the secrets you spilled WAY too early in the later chapters. Or at least that’s what I tell myself. LOL
September 10th, 2008 at 11:46 am
I do like secrets and I also like to be surprised, but I think the control freak in me likes to know the secret before the other people in the story do. So, I never mind knowing either the H/H secret and then watching throughout the rest of the book how it is slowly leaked to the other.
September 10th, 2008 at 11:47 am
As a writer I think I’m like Kathy. I want to tell all right away and explain why my characters are acting the way they are. I’m a big explainer! I have to get away from telling to showing!
September 10th, 2008 at 12:04 pm
I love mystery in my romance. I continually get dinged for it though. Everyone seems to want to know the whys of the situation all the time. It drives me batty. I answer the questions just not when they want it.
Your topic couldn’t have been more timely.
Renee
September 10th, 2008 at 12:36 pm
Sin, Scientists don’t think of themselves as hackers. *g*
If the creator hadn’t wanted us to read his diary he could easily have used an unbreakable code.
No, I think that he wanted us to read it but made it difficult to ensure that when we cracked it we would be ready for the awesome responsibility that goes with the knowledge.
Atomic power was discovered in the 1930s. Imagine if it had been available to every tinpot dictator on the planet!
Nuclear Fusion holds the promise of unlimited power which will enable humanity to expand into the galaxy and the wider universe beyond. No wonder He made it so difficult to control. We are not yet ready to go pissing through the galaxy!
The launch of the new Large Hadron Collider at CERN (its an enormous underground circular channel in which protons are accelerated to near light speed) may well release new understanding of the universe. Maybe offer the potential to create a black hole. I’m pretty sure that the creator will have made the associated engineering for controlling the power even more difficult than that for controlling fusion power.
Yep, the creator is a pretty smart guy.
I think that science is a pretty romantic subject with lots of secrets.
Maybe one of you wonderful authors could cash in on that. *g*
September 10th, 2008 at 1:22 pm
Q, I’m so glad you explained the LHC since Google is celebrating it today.
Sin, I second Kathy on the subject if your voice. It is distinctive.
There is a secret that I never expected in TLWH. It transforms a secondary character who I thought was just a jealous jerk until he told another secondary character his secret. She told Max, and the jerk became the hero of Book 3. Who knew?
September 10th, 2008 at 1:52 pm
I’m pretty sure I just learned something scientific from Q’s comment. You have no idea what a big deal that is but it’s big.
Janga - Who knew, indeed?! I love that. Now I have even more reason to be anxious about reading this book!
September 10th, 2008 at 2:39 pm
Irish, I’m a control freak too. I have to know everything and I have to have control over what’s to come. That’s just how I’m hard wired.
September 10th, 2008 at 2:42 pm
Q- You know, it’s weird. I was just thinking of what you would be thinking about the collinder and you go and mention it. We’re on the same wavelength today. It could be scary for the rest of the planet.
And the correct term is cracker instead of hacker, but there is a lot of different connotations of “cracker” so I used hacker in the general reference of things. And let me have my delusions. I like to think of you as a hacker of science.
And, the code is easy for those who know the ways on how to break it. It’s the same in any language. You just have to have the skills to use them to your advantage.
Except you’re a helluva lot smarter than me. You definitely make science more interesting.
September 10th, 2008 at 2:47 pm
Janga, even when I read back things that I’ve written (and yes, after both you and Kathy mentioned my voice today, I went back through my blog and read it) I still don’t hear my voice. Maybe it’s because I hear myself narrating it and don’t hear my actual writing voice. But I never read anything thinking it sounds like me. Am I the only one that feels that way?
I love secrets that reveal themselves to you at the last minute! It’s always interesting to hear from writers who are surprised by their own characters! As a reader you like to think the writer of the book knows everything that’s going on at any given minute and how their characters react to one another and how secondary characters actually play into the story line. I love when that stuff sneaks up on you as the writer and I think it makes the writer seem more human when you, the reader, finds out that the writer is human and writes to let the story unfold for them too.
I seem to forget sometimes that authors are still human and write like the rest of us.
September 10th, 2008 at 3:15 pm
Sin - you ARE the only one who feels that way. You have a very distinctive voice.
And I too love when the characters surprise me with something. When I started writing I had no idea Celi did photography for a hobby. She just told me one day. Kind of like when Bryan decided they needed to work in the evenings. I didn’t know it until I typed the dialogue of him saying it. And it’s total genius for the story. Wish I’d thought of it. LOL!
September 10th, 2008 at 3:44 pm
Hmmm. I think I can tell my voice when I read over what I write. Mainly because it does sound like something I’d say or exaggerate.
September 10th, 2008 at 4:56 pm
Damn thing just ate my comment. *sigh* Nothing is working right for me today. Woe is little ole me.
Anyway, Hellion, I can always hear your voice in your writing. Not to mention hearing you narrate it as I’m going on. The two are seperate from each other but very much you.
September 11th, 2008 at 10:05 am
I like The Big Reveal
To be a revelation of the True Motivations behind the H&H’s actions.
Think Tsunami
Hit me hard. Sweep me away. And yes… I should have seen it coming.
September 11th, 2008 at 10:43 am
And Q if you want to know how God’s mind works, then spend an hour with me. It won’t take a scientific study to conclude that Nuclear Fusion isn’t the only force of Nature created by God…
that is difficult to control…
Spend a day with me. And you will have enough data for irrevocable Proof that God must have a Rather Peculiar sense of Humor. He must. Why else would He have created me … and then unleashed me upon an unsuspecting world?
God help you all.
And God bless you, Quantum on this happiest of occasions.
Happy Birthday!
September 11th, 2008 at 10:51 am
Happy birthday Q!
Today is my father’s birthday too. It’s a special day all around.
Julie- God’s got a wicked sense of humor, my little kewpie doll.
September 11th, 2008 at 10:54 am
Yes indeed!